Parenting - Is there a Right Way ??

  • 3 min read

Today, I would like to use this space to share my views about one of the most important phases of our life Journey and that is," Parenting". The art of Parenting is not taught in any college or universities but it is something that we start learning when we become one. This Art is so common, but yet so different and uncommon! There are so many infinite layers to it, everyday we learn something new as a parent don't we ??

But one question lingers my mind always, Is there anything as "Right Parenting" ?? Is there a barometer to measure the right level of parenting ?? Or is there some sort of benchmark to which we can compare to see if we are right as parents ?? The Answer to this is NO.

All of us know this very well. But end of the day we all work hard and strive to become "the right parent" "the good parent'. And we also expect the same from our children. Don't We ?? In this process of becoming a perfect one or making our children the perfect one, we not only stress and pressurise ourselves but also our children. Not only that, we also do not live in the moment.

So the essence of this write up is to reach out to all parents and tell them, not to judge themselves as parents and at the same time not to judge their children as well. It is somewhere very important to understand their latent talent and capabilities and set realistic goals and standards for them. At the same time it is important that as a parent we should not be too critical about how you are because its not a target that you have set for yourself nor goal that you need to achieve or a deadline that you need to meet. Your performance is not being evaluated or monitored. Its ok if we go wrong, after all, we learn from what we do !

But of course there are certain things that we could do. Our key role as a parent is to foster and support the physical, emotional, social and intellectual health of the child and these 4 thing form the four pillars of child's overall development. The extent of support needed under each of these four aspects may vary from child to child.

Let us understand this better, we all love growing plants right ? Some plants need more water, some plants less, some may need more sunlight and a few grow in the shade. Drawing a parallel, when each kid is different, their potential is different, then how can a single method of parenting style or approach be designed to handle them ?

What are the certain things that we do in order to raise a Happy Child ?

  • Identify their capabilities and their potential, things that they good at.
  • Set a realistic expectation from them
  • Appreciate them for their efforts
  • Spend time with them to understand them better
  • Make them understand emotions and teach them how to communicate emotions.
  • Try not to be over protective and encourage them to manage themselves.
  • Involve them in your family gathering or kitchen time or even encourage them to help you in your household chores.
  • Two things we could resist from doing is Criticise or Compare. Both Cs will not help us but instead could worsen the relationship with the child

I would like to end by quoting the phrase of Sue Atkins that is very inspiring, "There is no such thing as Perfect Parent, just be a Real One"

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Author / Speaker  →

Freelance Clinical psychologist and on call consultant psychologist for Athulya senior care. Expert Panelist for online mental health portals for PARENTUNE and RYTLIFE
A mental wellness therapist/ counsellor/ psychologist. I believe in maintaining healthy mind enriched with healthy postive thoughts.
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